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Monogamy?

Good Morning--Today's Question:

  I have been thinking for some time that Monogamy in sexual/familial relationships is a key principle of any moral system...with all the many traditional values and standards being debated these days--where does Monogamy stand? Will it soon be seen by many in the USA as unfairly restrictive? Will there be any moral system that upholds it? What is the future of Monogamy?

Comments

James Cramer Replied:

There are both plays and films that in various ways advocate "menages a trois" or even more "open" relationships. My own reaction to all I've seen is that they gloss over an essential selfishness that motivates the "openness." And they also fail to treat their subject realistically. Certainly some would accuse me of approaching the issue with my own biases, and of course we all do that. Nevertheless, I still think I may be seeing something people who'd suggest monogamy may be too rigid are missing.
True enough...I am more concerned that people will erode the usual "social contract" in relationships---e.g., with logic like, "Monogamy is overrated--after all, doesn't everyone cheat, and statistically speaking, fooling around is not rare, so why include monogamy in the requirements of a relationship?" Anyway, that kind of rhetoric would seem to be what the nation is headed for...without monogamy, there are potential consequences--maybe for children?
Colleen said…
I agree with you both. The insistence that one "cannot be monogamous" or that there is no need for monogamy in society any more often comes from an essential selfishness, the same that underlies many social dilemma of our times. Are the progressives stating that people should be free of social mores because they see it as demonstrably better, or because they want freedom from responsibility? I think we saw in the 60's that free love and other extreme liberties rarely worked for more than an individual here and there, because another person who does not agree or has emotional attachments to relationships is affected by that individual's choice. This is especially true for children, who cannot choose in these situations to have one parent, or a committed family unit.
Getting back to the larger point, however, I agree that the "freedom" rhetoric is permissive rather than liberating, and that the erosion of social absolutes has the negative effect of "everything is okay" - when we can see that, in effect, it is not, or open relationships would have swept the world by now.
Excellent point, Colleen--that "open relationships would have swept the world by now." And They have not. And many people still opt for traditional marriage...I suspect the fact that so many end in divorce is this "erosion" of social mores that leave people feeling unable to stay committed...

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